“With judging eyes watching, the drama runs deep as the girls struggle with living up to the expectations of their parents and their congregations. As temptation, redemption, guilt and the path to right and wrong collide, will these preachers’ daughters choose sin or salvation?” 

You just read an excerpt taken from an advertisement on MyLifetime.com for the reality series, Preachers’ Daughters that is currently in its second season.  I must say that this show disturbs me on so many levels.  Being the parent of a preacher’s three daughters, I could not imagine putting our girls on display for the world to share in their indiscretions.  Not only do these kids experience a certain level of scrutiny that the average church kid does not, now the world gets to judge these young ladies as well.  You have to wonder if they have possibly kicked it up a notch since the cameras are rolling.  What is truly the purpose and how can this be beneficial to their spiritual walk?

If I am honest, I indulge in a reality show or two myself and can therefore understand the fascination with watching people’s lives unfold before our eyes.  It just really bothers me that these young ladies are not adults, they are children who are not mature enough to make a decision about putting their lives on full display and who will forever be just a Google away from view.  I would be really interested in interviewing these young ladies about five to ten years from now to see how they feel about their behavior as teens being televised.  The same should be said about Honey Boo Boo and other kids who are basically exploited for entertainment purposes, it just doesn’t seem right to me.  What say you?

Blessings and Inspiration,

Shannon Ayers Speaks

Most people that follow gospel music know Tina and Erica Campbell as the award winning, gospel singing sensation, Mary Mary.  They are currently in the third season of their reality tv series chronicling their lives and music career.  The latest buzz regarding this gospel duo is Tina Campbell candidly speaking about her husband’s affair.  Tina fully disclosed details regarding her husband’s infidelity in an interview with Ebony magazine.  She also chose to forgive her husband and try to work things out with him to keep their family together.

She recently did another interview where she disclosed how she shared in the responsibility of her husband’s unfaithfulness.  She mentioned how she put her kids first, that she was controlling and selfish.  She mentioned how at times she did not treat him respectfully.  Since then, there has been much chatter in cybersphere criticizing Tina for her comments and admission.  This was really shocking to me that she would be so heavily criticized for speaking her truth.

Lay off of Tina and let her live her truth and heal in a way that is best for she and her family.  Don’t judge her because you don’t fully understand her admitted role in the demise of her marriage.  In no way did she give him a pass for cheating.  Anyone in a mature adult relationship should understand that in no way is infidelity acceptable under any kind of circumstances.  He has taken full responsibility and admitted to his cowardice for what he did.  Allow her situation to be an encouragement to either help you heal from your own situation or not end up having the same experience.

Men and women have to know how to treat their significant other with respect, intimacy and companionship.  In other words, you should do everything in your power to maintain a healthy and fulfilled relationship.  Ladies, we should not demean and emasculate our men because we are educated with a good job.  It also means being intimately available and yes, vulnerable too.  And remember, take care of your kids but keep your husband as a priority.  Those kids grow up to have their own lives.  Men, you should not be dismissive, insensitve and disrespectful to your lady.  It also means communicating and sharing openly instead of just talking with your friends.  When your lady is intimately available you should not take that as a license to make that the most significant part of your relationship.  For both men and women alike, keep God at the center of your relationship which will help you both identify a healthy balance of what it takes to keep the relationship solid.  What say you?

Blessings and Inspiration,

ShannonAyersSpeaks

There is a song that my pastor use to sing all the time back home.  “Count your blessings name them one by one. Count your blessings, see what God has done. Count your blessings name them one by one.  Count your many blessings see what God has done.”  I sometimes hear that song in my head when I get to complaining about how things are not as they should be.  We waste so much energy on the negative in life that we neglect to give presence to the blessings we enjoy everyday.

My husband is truly my best friend and we have a special kind of love that surpasses anything that could come between us.  My children are all beautiful, intelligent, extremely creative little beings that I could not have ever imagined having given them birth.  I have a good paying job that many thought I would never have.  I have a degree and in the process of completing two more.  I am saved by the grace of a God who bled and died for me on a cross while suffering persecution.  I could go on and on and on about the many things of which I am privileged to enjoy as a blessing.  Now that’s today.  I have gone through my moments where I sometimes forget all of those things I mentioned because I am blinded by the things that should not take precedence over my life.

It is so easy to get caught up into the things that aren’t quite working out like we expected.  But when that happens, instead of giving light to negativity, we should remind ourselves of what we do have and know that God is the Author and Finisher of our faith(Hebrews 12:2) and also our FATE.  We put so much stock into what we can and cannot do and what we have done before but often forget that we are not in charge.  If we follow God’s perfect and divine will for our lives our steps are already ordered.  We just have to find that “yellow brick road” to the destination path he has already paved for us. “His Word is a light unto our feet and a lamp to our path.” (Psalms 119:105). Be of good courage and count your blessings, learn from your failures and grow thereby!!

Blessings and Inspiration,

ShannonAyersSpeaks

I just spent a couple of months in a funk because my life isn’t where I want it to be. I was a bit grouchy with my husband and kids. Every little thing irritated me. That time of the month only made it worse.

My job situation is far from inspiring. I still have two classes to finish a Masters degree and three classes to to finish another, yet it still seems so far out of reach. The kids won’t clean up after themselves without me yelling from the time I get home from work until they go to bed. Lastly, I really want to lose weight.

Okay, that’s everyone’s life right? One day I had to ask what was I doing to encourage myself into a better tomorrow.  It was a slap in the face question because I realized at that moment that I am the culprit hindering my progress. I had to reflect on the aforementioned realizing that if I want my job to be more inspiring for intellectual stimulation, promotion, learning and growth, I have to make it happen.

So I started learning other jobs in my department so that I can increase my knowledge base and experience, make myself more visible in the workplace and become more marketable for other growth opportunities.  As for school, I have to refocus and “get’er” done without excuses and make the necessary sacrifices to get pass the finish line.  Afterall, I made it this far right?  About the kids, I had to start removing fun stuff until they’ve earned it. I had to hold them accountable for their environment without the feeling of “Mommy Guilt” when it comes withholding their stuff.  Lastly, in order to lose weight, I have to make a health choice in deciding to just do it.  It really is that simple.  Five pounds down already!!! Who Whoo!!!!! The importance of me losing weight is so that I can be healthy and increase my life span for as long as God allows me to walk this earth. I also have so many cute clothes that are just calling my name, but I can’t answer back until I get the weight off (It’s a girl thing!!).

So what should all of this mean to you? Are you holding you back from living your best life and enjoying the journey?  What can you change in your environment that can reroute your path in a more positive direction?  Make the decision today to change at least one thing that is not working for you.  It may be a relationship, a spiritual walk, family, career, etc. Whatever it is, get it moving right now! You have to start somewhere.  Baby steps are all it takes.  Will I stick to everything I just mentioned?  I don’t know. Whether I do or don’t, I have taken away my right to complain!!!

Blessings and Inspiration,

ShannonAyersSpeaks